When fear directs my steps

Anxiety grips my son's body. Often.

Fear shoots from his eyes as his brain tries to calculate the happenings around him.

I hug him tight, trying to squeeze out the fear and replace it with loving comfort, while inwardly I scream to God for help.

Lord, I can't do this! Can't you see that my body aches with exhaustion? Lord, give me wisdom!

When my oldest son is in the throes of anxiety, brought on largely by Fragile X Syndrome, his view of the world around him causes him to lose his footing with reality.

The same thing happens to me. Only I don't have Fragile X Syndrome.

I have unbelief.

When fear grips me, I thrash around and desperately try to fix whatever problem arises. I lose focus and attempt to lean on my own strength. I complain. I doubt. I lose hope. I rely on my sight and not my faith.

When I allow fear to determine my steps,

     I become like the ten spies who trembled at the first sight of Canaan;

     I become like Gideon who laid out a fleece to test God;

     I become like the two men who, ironically, traveled with the risen Savior but did not have hope;

     I become like Thomas who believed upon seeing instead of by faith alone.

But it doesn't have to be that way {Praise God!}.  When I focus on Christ, I allow His Word to guide my path.

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. Psalm 119:105

I allow hope, not fear, to direct my steps.

And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, 'This is the way, walk in it,' when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left. Isaiah 30:21

Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10