October 9, 2012

when change demands growth

As we neared the Sunday school classroom, Grant clutched my hand with a grip that said, please don't let me go.

Eyes wide with fear, he pulled me down and placed his fingers on my mouth. He wants me to speak his words for him. He wants me to say aloud the phrases he wishes to shout. As I held him close I could feel his heart drum with an anxious beat.

My own heart melted as I soothed him into the new situation. I searched my mind for a way to make him understand that he will never be alone. He is safe here.

He doesn't know it, but this whole situation has been planned to the smallest detail. For weeks people have worked hard to pull together a team of "buddies" for Grant. They have been gathered together and trained. Nothing has been overlooked. He will be taken care of... he will be loved.

He is loved.

But Grant doesn't understand - not yet. He cannot see the big picture as I can. He must trust me. This new situation is scary and will be difficult at first. But it will help him to grow and develop. And he will never, never be alone during the whole process.

I whispered a prayer for strength into Grant's ears as I led him into his new room. I pulled him close and began to quietly sing a song based on Psalm 56:3-4; a song often sung when Grant is feeling anxious.

     When I am afraid,
     I will put my trust in You.
     In God, whose word I praise,
     In God I have put my trust;
     I shall not be afraid.

I know God is whispering the same truth to me. Trust me...

Once again, I am entering another scary situation*.  I am being forced to change - to grow - to trust.

It is not fun but I know the outcome will produce fruits of faith I long for... and I pray that it will bring glory to God.

A state of mind that sees God in everything is evidence of growth in grace and a thankful heart. ~ Charles Finney

Adversity is not simply a tool. It is God's most effective tool for the advancement of our spiritual lives. The circumstances and events that we see as setbacks are oftentimes the very things that launch us into periods of intense spiritual growth. Once we begin to understand this, and accept it as a spiritual fact of life, adversity becomes easier to bear. ~ Charles Stanley

Thank you to all of Grant's "buddies" and to the dedicated body of Christ who surrounds us with love. In just four short weeks, I have seen Grant grow. While it may be slow, he is adapting to the new challenges and it is exciting to watch his development.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The past couple weeks have moved at a different pace. The family has been fighting colds and Grant came down with the flu. Thankfully we are all on the mend. :)

*Will you pray?

Grant has been exhibiting symptoms of mitochondrial disease and dysautonomia.

I am still gathering information - still learning - but I have been prompted to seek medical attention.

I will keep you updated. Perhaps it is nothing... but either way, God is faithful and we praise Him!

  Thank you.



  1. so beautiful Karen. thank you. and will be praying for Grant.

  2. You take such beautiful pictures but the first one in this post is incredible. Praying for quick answers with Grant's symptoms and that he will continue to adjust at church. We just started Toby in a new preschool just a few hours a day and he doesn't love it and dropping him off breaks my heart every day. Transitions aren't just hard on our FXers!


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