Some might say (and I might be one of them from time-to-time) that 2009 was not kind to the Mayes family. It was a difficult year for certain but one that forced us to grow in our faith. If there is one thing I have learned from the trials of 2009 it is how to live out Philippians 4:6: "Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." I've always heard not to worry and leave everything up to God - only, practically speaking, I had no idea how to do that. In fact, the natural worry-wort that I am sometimes prides myself in being stressed and always on the go - fully in-charge of course. However, there comes a point when you just cannot go on living in the "I've-got-it-all-under-control" mode. When reality catches up to your brain and you know that you are not in control one bit. That was 2009 for me. At first this reality hit me like mack truck. I entered a dark valley where I was completely terrified of the future. Then I got really angry (maybe even a little bitter). After shedding many tears and few panic attacks, I crumbled before God crying, "This is not how life was meant to be lived!" I had to relearn (and am still learning) how to live each day. I've heard and read Philippians 4:6 countless times but one day its truth jumped out at me. I have so much to be thankful for. In spite of all the petty and not so petty troubles I am going through, I am so blessed. In my light bulb moment I decided each day to write down a blessing I experience. Big or small. Then, taking those blessings I turn to God and thank him for those blessings and pray for our needs. This process adjusted my attitude. My fear turned into praising and thanking God. I wish I could say I am a completely new person and I no longer have any fears, but that would not be true. It is a daily journey - a daily struggle. But now, when fear overtakes me, I have a plan and peace knowing that it is God who is in control.
OK, I have rambled enough. The purpose of this blog is not only to keep friends and family informed about our life, but also to bookmark and share our blessings. I also want to say I am very sorry to the friends and family that I have shut-out this past year (I truly did not mean to). I was, and am, in survival mode but want to reconnect with everyone - hopefully this blog with help. Happy 2010!
Your comments just caused me to again fall on my knees and worship the all-sovereign God. Flowers bloom more profusely in the valleys.
ReplyDeleteAlso, LOVED!!! the pictures.